Always and Forever [5/24/13]

Hello hello hello!

So lately, I have been falling deeper and deeper in love with my beautiful saviour and wonderful creator. It's so nice to be able to spend time with him daily, rejoicing and thanking him for how he has blessed me! When I was still in Sunday School, I can remember thinking "how is it possible that people talk about God all the time? Aren't we going to run out of things to talk about? We talk about him every week... I DON'T UNDERSTAND."

What a silly little girl I was! As I dive into the word, I'm not only discovering more about God, but also discovering how little I know about God. It's a chain reaction. When one question is answered, two more pop up! As I've been seeking him more, one of God's many characteristics has been sticking out to me and challenging me in new ways.

Psalm 16:8
I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

Matthew 28:20
...And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.

Deuteronomy 31:8
The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.

These verses are only the tiniest examples of God's persistence and consistence in our lives! I'm sure all of you have experienced similar ups and downs in your faith and lives to my own. We have our good days and our bad days, we have our struggles and our joys, our trials and tribulations. But we have a God who always remains the same! There's no such thing as a bad day for him. He doesn't go through the same roller coaster rides that we go through - he is constant in our lives and persistently showing us his beauty and love no matter how hard we try to push it away.

This brings me great comfort knowing how reliable, dependable and consistent our father is! When everything in this world falls away, we will still have our father - he does not change like shifting shadows (James 1:17)

When I see verses that say "surely I am with you always" and "he will never leave you or forsake you" it reminds me of multiple choice questions on exam. Before you get super confused, question how God reminds me of a multiple choice question and then call me crazy, hear me out.

In the beginning of first year, I went to the Academic Success Center to get some advice because I was absolutely terrible at multiple choice questions (I mean seriously, who tells you to pick the better answer of two right answers?!) Anyways, one piece of advice they gave me was to try avoiding answers that contain the words "always" or "never" because nothing is consistent enough to be always or never.

What great advice! It's so very true! Things in this world will not go on forever and ever. Things on this earth are simply temporary and will one day cease to exist, but God is the one constant in all of our lives! Always loving and guiding us as we journey through this world. This love and persistence he has shown us has brought up a desire in my heart to be just like him in this way! Persistently loving my fellow brothers and sisters in all situations and at all times! I know there will always be people in this world we struggle with - people who manage to push all the right buttons at all the right times. I have people in my life who seem to just cause so much trouble for themselves and then complain about it endlessly - asking me for love and attention that I eventually become reluctant to give. It's easy to stop paying attention to these people and spending the time we used to because we don't want to hear about how they made the exact same mistake as the last ten mistakes.

Yet this is one of the many ways our father loves us. We are constantly making the exact same mistakes over and over again! We try to learn from our mistakes but we so often end up making the same ones. But thankfully, God is persistent and patient with us. He loves us and is there for us despite the situation and I hope to love my fellow brothers and sisters just as he loves me. How eternally grateful I am to my saviour! I am grateful for him loving me despite all of my silly mistakes and mountains of complaints! I hope to imitate my wonderful maker and learn to love even those who push those buttons! Join me in this journey of learning to love as God first loved us :)

"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."
- Ephesians 5:1

- kjoosaurus out! 

The Lord is my shepherd [05/22/13]

Hello to my wonderful friends :)

I've received many encouraging words about this blog, and I want to thank you for the kind words you've spoken! I've found that I'm rather unskilled at expressing my gratitude to people, but in reality, I am actually extremely grateful! I really do thank God for using you to encourage and challenge me. I'm better at expressing myself through writing so FEEL MY LOVE AND THANKS! :D

I love the way God works. He is so detail-oriented, meticulous, mysterious and exciting! The way he plans things in his perfect timing is amazing and mind-blowing every time he reveals part of his plan to me.

Yesterday, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed... The very wrong side. You know those mornings when you just feel groggy and disoriented? That was my Tuesday morning. When I wake up like that, I dread the day ahead because I'm grumpy and lazy and sensitive and just a bunch of not so very good things. So there went wrong side of the bed Kristen, walking very slowly to meet her friend at Starbucks and secretly, but not so secretly, wishing she could stay in bed forever.

As I waited, I said to God, "Please give me the energy to get through the day. Please give me the motivation to stay out and not cancel all of my plans and go home to my really warm and cozy bed."

You know what's cool? When you can SEE God answering your prayers! God is very true to his words.

1 John 5:14
And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us.

Once I met up with my friend, we started talking about our faith. She's a brand new Christian friend I met in my Spanish class. She told me her testimony, about her life in Rwanda, about her many struggles with her family, about betrayals from the past and she just listed so many things she had gone through that I could never even imagine going through. Then, as she began to tell me about how Christ had saved her, I saw such pure and genuine love for God in her expressions and I could hear the thankfulness in her voice. I was so encouraged by her! Her ability to remain optimistic and hopeful in Christ when everybody else had hurt her and deserted her.

My day didn't end there either! Later on, I was walking along Mackenzie King bridge, and I made eye contact with the most beautiful pair of blue eyes I have seen. I've seen many beautiful blue eyes, but this pair was especially captivating. These eyes belonged to a homeless man sitting on the side, asking for spare change. Normally, I just say "sorry, I don't have any change" (which I don't) and then proceed with my day, but I just had to stop and talk to him. He told me about his day, about the "newbie" panhandlers, about how this was his spot and how he had to kick people out of his spot sometimes. It was a simple conversation, but he was just filled with so much joy and happiness! I had to run to catch my bus, but as I was leaving, he gave me an excellent handshake accompanied with an enormous smile and said, "My name is Frankie. It was really nice to meet you."

God really provides us with everything we need. Sometimes, I laugh at myself because I worry about the silliest things like having to deal with people in my disoriented state of mind. I laugh because I know I have an all-powerful God who is constantly providing for me and loving me, yet I still worry.

In John 14:27, Jesus says:
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

What Jesus has to offer us is beyond anything the world tries to offer us. Thanks to Jesus, we can live every single day with joy and peace in our hearts. What the world hands us is temporary and short-lived, but what Christ has offered to us is beyond all else and I'm grateful for this truth in my life! I'm grateful for the way God leads me to people who will encourage me and brighten up my day - constantly showing me his goodness and captivating love.

This is not at all what I was planning on writing about, but that's okay because I was still able to share God's goodness in my life! :)

I want to end this post with Psalm 23.

This was my grandmother's favourite Psalm. It has always meant a lot to me, but as I saw her rejoice in the truth of these words in her passing days, it has found an extra special place in my heart. I'm working on memorizing it and I encourage you to join me! It will probably take me a while since my memory isn't my forte, so don't worry if your memory is bad too! :)

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. 

He makes me lie down in green 

pastures.

He leads me beside still waters. 

He restores my soul.

He leads me in paths of righteousness

for his name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley

of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil, 

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff, 

they comfort me. 

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies; 

you anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows. 

Surely goodness and mercy shall

follow me

all the days of my life

and I shall dwell in the house of the 

Lord 

forever." 

The Glory of God [9/28/12]

Hello :]

I'm back again! Haha. Second time in a WEEK. How exciting. I wish I had written more this summer... I actually really enjoy writing, and I love sharing with people, but as I've mentioned before, I was really struggling this summer and I think I just didn't feel like I was in the right place to be writing and sharing with people. But today, I'm writing because I want to share about what I learned from the struggle!

It's crazy how much of a difference time can make; we can go from the lowest point to the highest point in such a short time. But what do we have to do to get there? What is happening in the time from the lowest to the highest point? What is working - WHO is working? 

I'm not sure if everybody else is the same, but the biggest aspect I've noticed from my roller coaster ride in my life, is that in every second, in every twist and turn, I see God. I see his hands moving from one end to the other; I see them working in building, shaping and moulding. For some reason, I normally don't see it in the process of it, but I notice it afterwards when it has already been done. 

God has taught me something absolutely amazing these past few months. . As I was going through struggles this past while, I was feeling so alone and useless. I felt like nobody wanted me, and nobody cared about me. It really sucked! I kept complaining and complaining. "God, why are you doing this to me? Why are you letting this happen?" But he just remained silent, and I was forced to endure everything "alone." 

This went on for months. I was in the dark; I was lost. I came back to Ottawa in hopes that everything would become perfect again, but nope, I was wrong. I was still in the dark. I forced myself to go to church, I forced myself to help out, and I forced myself to pray. Then, things started to get even worse. Everyday was a struggle. It felt like my friends were absent from my life, and I didn't have my family with me either. I didn't know what I was doing! 

Then I started to notice something weird. Well, it's not really weird, it's great, but it was different. I noticed an abundance of people in my life who loved and cared for me. They were coming from all different directions; they were people I never would have expected to come into my life. I didn't really realize the work behind it all at first, but then as I kept talking with friends, one friend mentioned to me the glory of God, and how we should be thankful at all times.

That's when it hit me. It was GOD! He was comforting me and He was loving me. He was the hand behind it all, and He was teaching me to remember that He will never forsake me or abandon me, and that I should always be grateful for whatever He does, and for whatever I'm going through. It doesn't matter how bad a struggle is, or how bad a problem is. He will always be there, and he will always be glorified in every situation. 

1 Peter 4: 12-13:
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. 

We are lucky to be able to go through the pain and sufferings, for God will be glorified through it all! We should always rejoice, and always praise His name, for He has blessed us to be able to experience not only the pain, but His glory as well!! I often forget that this world is not my home... It's only a pit stop before we go to our real home, and we get to be with our Father. 

I hope we can all try our best to remember to be thankful at all times, and to rejoice in our sufferings and our joys! I'm sorry this post is a bit messy... I blame it on my illness hehe. But I hope you get the general gist of it! May your day be filled with joy~

kjoosaurus out!