Hello brothers and sisters!
My, oh my it has been a long time, hasn't it? It's been about a couple of months since the last time I was able to write anything, but I can assure you that the time was well spent doing things of worth rather than spending my time being unproductive.
Quick summary of our time apart:
- I actually a lot study now (I know, I'm surprised too)
- God has been working on my character! In ways I see, yet still do not fully understand.
- I am temporarily employed! (Temporary because I'm still looking for a job with better hours)
This summary doesn't really cover all the bases of what has been going on in the past while - I've been meaning to blog as I was always inspired by the works of God seen in my life, but for some reason, the opportunity was never taken.
I wish I could tell you about everything that has been happening in my life, but I would be writing forever and ever. I'll try my best to organize my thoughts in a way that is clear, concise and understandable. Okay, here we go!
The past 60 days were filled with disappointment, struggles, joy, love and a lot of eye opening. I've never been a deep thinker. Life to me is black and white. It's filled with lines where the in-between is illegible to me. When I'm forced to think too deeply and it gets hard, I easily give up. But God has been changing this in my once simple life.
Simply put, I have learned a bit more of three things:
1. Satan's lies
2. My true character
3. God's character
Satan's lies... They surround us in this world as it is a world where Satan is deemed as King: he promises comfort, satisfaction and pleasure. If we are to succumb to the pressures of this world, then we will be forever happy as we drown in endless amounts of money, food, gadgets and fun. He plays with the fleshly desires that we as humans are faulted with. He lies to us and tells us one of two things: God is bad or sin is better.
His lies, they are so simple - why do we fall for them over and over again?
We are sheep. We are lost without our shepherd who will love us and find us when we are lost, but praise the Lord for we are able to recognize his voice and learn to stop being deceived by the multitude of voices that claim to lead the way for us. In John 10, Christ explains so well how his sheep will recognize his voice and follow him through the gate. He paints an image of protection as he describes to what extent he will go just to protect his sheep. I want to be the sheep that is able to recognize the voice of the shepherd - the sheep who will diligently be lead by the shepherd.
As I became more aware of the lies Satan has been deceiving me with, God also guided me in becoming more aware of my true character. As I learn more about the different lies I have believed, I've realized how much the Lord has done in my life and also how much further I have to go!
I've been cowardly in my way of living. All my life, I have never been able to hold my ground when it came to any opinions I held. In arguments, I would always give in. Even in essays I wrote, I would always receive the same comments: Your arguments are valid, but you need to stick firmly to your opinion.
I was recently listening to a sermon when I came across this phrase: Nail one's colors to the mast.
I didn't understand at all what this meant, so I looked it up on the ever so useful Google and found a definition that convicted me of how I have lived my life so far.
In the 17th century, flags were lowered as a mark of submission. It is believed the phrase "nail one's colors to the mast" came from a battle where the English fleet was at the point where the main ship had been brought down and to the rest of the fleet, it may have appeared to be defeat, but the admiral climbed to what was left of the mast and nailed the flag at the top where it was visible to the rest of the fleet. This act of perseverance resulted in the English fleet being victorious.
To be able to stand so firmly in a seemingly lost battle. That is what it means to nail one's colors to the mast.
I am not a persistent person by nature, but with God, all things are possible. He gives us the strength to persist in battles that are lost. When people aren't responding to the gospel that is preached, when trials and tribulations are the persistent ones in the picture, when it seems as if you are alone in a dark world. That is when it is crucial to nail your colors to the mast. For God will be VICTORIOUS.
This finally leads us to God's character. He's such a mysterious God who works in such mysterious ways. The God of all gods, King of all kings, Lord of all lords. We so often hear people preach about the beautiful and wonderful things he has done in our lives. "God loves you so much. God wants you so much. God is love." These things are so true! The bible even says that "God is love." (1 John 4:8) I was raised on this teaching. I was raised to believe that God is a warm, loving, fuzzy wuzzy God who just wants me to lean on him when I'm having a hard time. But, I never took the time to think about the full character of God.
Yes, he is a God who loves us oh so dearly, and a God we must love! But, he is also a God we must fear. This is what I have only recently been applying to my life. A God whom I must fear. How often do I think about how powerful God is? The answer is, rarely. I often forget that this is the God who simply spoke the universe into existence. SPOKE. THE WORLD. INTO EXISTENCE. Astronomers estimate the universe to consist of over 100 billion galaxies and our God spoke it into existence. I can't even think of anything or anybody to compare that to. That is how powerful our God is.
My life was spent believing in a God of love, but this was not truly God I was believing in. Our God is a God we must love, and fear. In a sermon, I heard somebody talking about how we are not truly believing in God if we live a life thinking God is just a God of love, or if God is just a God we fear. He is both things. An all-powerful, all-knowledgeable, loving, caring God. Capable of all things - creating the universe, speaking every detail of our lives into existence. Now that, is my God.
I'm still in a learning process. This is just the beginning, but praise God for bringing me to where I am now. Praise God for revealing himself in our lives.
As I see my brothers and sisters in Christ growing together, I am challenged and convicted. I thank God so much for bringing them into my life as they help me become more thirsty for God. At times, I am tempted to run away from this life. I've been tempted to throw it all down and make a run for it because in a worldly sense, being a Christian really isn't easy, but Christ has shown me how worth it all is. He understands me and allows me to rejoice in these struggles. He lets me follow him, he feeds me when I'm hungry and gives me water when I'm thirsty.
I hope I can spend more time sharing with you the mysterious workings of God in my life, and I hope we can grow together as we learn to love, rejoice and serve.
Rabbi yhebbik. (God loves you)
- kjoosaurus out!
